Dr. Charles W. Ferguson

Today, I had the opportunity to talk to my brother-in-law about a whole lot of things. He shared with me many challenges and issues that of been going on in his life, that I definitely will not make mention of in this post. We talked for several hours, which for me at times can be very challenging. Why? I am a part of a group of people that have unusual challenges when it comes to the crowds, group settings, and other social events. I am an extroverted introvert.

There are many articles about people like me. Nevertheless, the main idea about my level of condition is I function best in intimate settings. My main objective in life is not necessarily to obtain great wealth, possessions, or even notoriety. (My publisher will probably kill me for that last line. LOL) My main objective is to create relationships with people.

For me, relationships that possess great value bring a serious level of life and energy to my existence. Over the past several days, I have been reflecting on the thought of why relationships are so important to me. My conversation with my brother-in-law unveiled why relationships are so important.

Having relationships provide the opportunity for individuals to give and to gain from being in one another’s presence. We don’t always seek out people for the purposes of meeting our desires. However, whenever you engage with an individual or allow that person into your intimate space, you are suggesting that this individual is important enough to engage in dialogue and conversation about the deepest places of the heart.

After reading this, you may say this is nothing more than the ramblings of an individual who can’t go to sleep. Part of that maybe true. Nevertheless, I challenge you to consider for a moment the following concepts.

1. Who is worthy of your time?
2. Do those people enhance your existence?
3. Is it possible that you might need a different circle?
4. Relationships must always build up and create life for all involved!

When I consider everything that I’ve done in life, and the people who have been a part of the journey, I must be honest in saying the only people that yet remain are those that have decided to engage in a real relationship building. I have discovered about myself that I can no longer engage people or allow people to invade my space with negativity and lack of progression.

So what are you saying?

I’m saying that in order for me to have the best and most important relationships of my life to date, I must engage with those that are willing and desire the same objective. I submit to you, consider the people you’re around. Consider their motives. Consider their direction. Everybody will not make it to the finish line with you. That is by design you know. Why? Because everybody has to want the deep things of the heart and mind. Do not waste energy on those that only want to remain in the same space when they know there is greater.

Beloved, engage as I have and do a heart check. If your heart doesn’t beat in the presence of your circle, ask God to resurrect your life today. Get your heartbeat back!

In preparing for my first published book, I’ve had to sit down with my publisher on many occasions to talk about the project. Yesterday, I ran into a moment where I began to default to old habits. I was asked pointblankly, are you OK? All I could do was sit there and say, I’m OK. Deep in my heart, I knew I wasn’t OK.

Before my meeting, I was dealing with so many emotions about life, the project, work, and internal strife. It felt like I couldn’t shake the idea that for the first time in my life I was close – I am close – to completing a major project that is not academic. Needless to say, your boy was dealing with serious fear. While wrestling fear, I did not have the heart to just say help.

Why does this happen to anybody?

In my case, I was always taught to find a way back to get it done. For me it was a coping and defensive mechanism to make sure that people didn’t hurt me, that I old no man or woman a debt, and in a sick twisted way I learned self-reliance.

Now is a grown man I realize the serious error of my ways. There’s no such thing as weakness when we need to ask for help. It is in the asking for help we learn about our own strengths and weaknesses. We find out if our personal circles have strengths or serious deficiencies. We discover our own limitations and our willingness to go beyond our competencies to find greater resources that enhance our ability to be great.

Help is not a stumbling block. Help is not a cry to expose our weaknesses. Help is necessary to build us up and take us places we have never been. So if you are a leader, a servant, a visionary, or a dreamer remember that asking for help is necessary to launch you to higher heights and deeper depths.

Have you ever heard of the word team? A team relies on several parts for success. In the early 90s, Michael Jordan finally found success when he went all in with his team. Yes, he is an all-time great, but without the other parts he would’ve never won six championships.

If we are going to find true success, we must be willing to let others not only support us, but help us also. More than you realize, the best parts of your life are always in position to aid you to your destiny.

I realize that it seems cliché to talk about love on Valentine’s Day. However, I think it is necessary to reflect on the nature of love that extends beyond the romantic. It is important that every day, 365 days out of the year, that the enterprise of love between human beings is fully examined, expressed, and engaged.

I recognize more than ever that my existence in this world would not be possible without the full expression of love at the high and low moments of my life. I can never repay anybody that is ever walked with me, talked with me, and let me know that my existence was priceless and worth it.

Many days, it can be difficult to look at yourself and say my existence has value. There are some people that on this day will be lamenting because there’s nobody that will send them a card, take them to a meal, or even engage in any of the marketing ploys brought on by the day.

I want to use my platform to let you know that no matter what the day will bring, you are absolutely important to the enhancement of this world. I want to use the space to just let somebody know you are loved today and every day. I know it is hard to believe sometimes that people still have any kind of emotional attachment or engagement with other people beyond social media or any other types of platforms.

Yet, you need to know that you are loved for all of your humanness. Your uniqueness is necessary. Your talent will enhance our world. Your beauty creates greater enhancement to the landscape. We need you.

We need you to be whole. We need you to be well. We need you to be intact. Heck, I need you as a part of this world to be the best version of yourself, as I need the same things for myself. In this world today, it is more important to love on one another then continue to perpetuate a landscape and space of hatred and negativity. Only when we genuinely care will we lift each other beyond the fragmented and divisive thought patterns that occupy our community and environment.Let us lift each other up. Love one another and watch change happen.

#love

#thoughtsbythestream