This Friday, my son CJ turns 11 years old. It feels surreal even writing that. Eleven. A number that somehow holds both innocence and strength, both growth and grounding. He’s growing into himself in a way that’s both beautiful and humbling to witness.
When CJ was born, I was flooded with emotion—some joy, some anxiety, all love. I didn’t have my own father in my life growing up, so stepping into fatherhood wasn’t just new territory—it felt like stepping into the unknown without a map. I didn’t know if I’d do it “right.” I wasn’t sure what I had to offer beyond love and a willingness to be present.
But every day, CJ teaches me that presence has power.
Every time I watch him interact with others—his kindness, his humor, his curiosity—I feel affirmed. Not because I’ve done everything right, but because somehow, God is allowing me to get this part of life right. Being CJ’s dad has been the greatest blessing of my life, and the most healing experience of my journey.
There is no amount of money I wouldn’t spend. No distance I wouldn’t travel. No mountain I wouldn’t climb for this boy. But more than anything, I want to give him something money can’t buy: the kind of advice I wish I had received from my own father.
So on this 11th birthday, I want to leave these words for CJ—words that I hope will live in his heart long after I’m gone:
To my son, CJ—
Do whatever it takes never to let this world make you feel less than.
Stay true to who you are, no matter the cost.
Your uniqueness is your superpower—don’t let anyone dull it to make themselves comfortable.
Never allow this world to strip you of your joy.
Laugh often. Cry when you need to. Dance when there’s no music.
Be the kind of person others can trust, and the kind of soul people hold in high regard.
Don’t take yourself too seriously, but never take this life for granted.
Every moment is sacred—make it count.
Live up to your own name, not the expectations of others.
You were not born to meet the imagination of people who don’t know your story.
You were born to fulfill purpose.
To walk with confidence in who you are.
To blaze a path that no one else could because no one else is you.
And when the noise of the world tries to drown out your voice, remember:
Your father sees you.
Your father believes in you.
And your father loves you—unapologetically, endlessly, and without condition.
CJ, being your dad is the greatest legacy I will ever carry. But my truest prayer is that you walk in a legacy of your own making. One that honors your name, your God, and your unique place in this world.
Happy Birthday, son. The world is better because you’re in it.
And I’m better because I get to be your father.
With all the love I have,
Dad
Dr. Charles W. Ferguson 